Battle Scarred

I’m battle scarred, I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be
-A Fine Frenzy

Trying to get back to a better mental head space. Back in the game. This is so exhausting already.

OK

OK. I get it. Sometimes there just aren’t any answers.

Changes

So last year (and pretty much forever), my reaction to highly stressful or upsetting situations would be to eat. I would feed my sadness with food.

This year, apparently I no longer feel the need to turn to food when upset. I’m not really sure why this change has occurred, but I’ve had absolutely no appetite for the past week. It’s weird. I’m hungry but I can’t eat.

I realize that neither reaction is necessarily healthy. But it is what it is.

Thought Bubbles

You know how in comic books people walk around with what they’re thinking conveniently written up in little thought bubbles? Why can’t we have the equivalent of that in real life? It would make interactions so much easier. Instead of having to guess at what an email, text message, or conversation really means, (if it actually means anything at all), you could just read the bubble and have clarity. Would that make things easier or just less exciting? The jury is out.

Forgetful

I think I kinda forgot how dating works.

Pros:
Anticipatory butterflies
Telling old worn out stories and having them glitter like new
Learning about someone else/ Having someone else learn about you
Small touches here and there, exciting and slightly subversive

Cons:
There are no rules to this game
It’s hard to figure out just how much of myself to reveal
Wondering how much we each like the other and what if the like isn’t equal
Waiting

Dating is fun. It’s also frustrating and stressful and exciting and lots of other things.

First Dates Are So… Interesting?

I should know, I’ve been on enough of them that I should add ‘expert in online dating’ to my LinkedIn profile.

Maybe not.

Going on a Second Date this weekend. It’s kind of exciting/nerve-wracking/scary/fun all at the same time.

It’s been a long time since my last second date. Actually, almost exactly a year. Last year I was miserable, unhappy with the way I felt and looked and lived. This year I consider myself a work in progress– there is still progress to be made, yes, but I feel like a totally different person. I feel younger, cute, fun, confident, happy, and optimistic. It’s a pretty good mental headspace to be in.

Zombie Apocalypse

Why is it that EVERY guy on this dating website I frequent feels the need to say that they spend their time thinking about what they would do if a zombie apocalypse happened? Does every single guy out there really spend all their time thinking about this? Or is it just lonely single guys? And if so, is a preoccupation with surviving a zombie onslaught the REASON why they are single? Or a byproduct of not being in a relationship?

See, these are the things that I spend my time thinking about. But it’s not as exciting as planning out an escape route from crazed flesh-hungry dead people.

Someecards

Someecards is a fantastic site with e-cards for just about any situation you might find yourself in. I saw this one on their site today and thought it was hilarious, especially since this has totally happened to me before. . . more than once!

Linguistics

What do you call a person whom you are dating… just dating… who isn’t your boyfriend? There has to be a word that is appropriate but not ridiculous.

Mondays are the Worst Days….

How bad was this Monday? Let me count the ways:

1. Spring forward. The clock in our classroom still read 7 AM this morning, instead of 8 AM. I woke up at what should have been 5:45 AM. UGH.

2. Midterms returned bright and early– NOT the way I prefer to wake up, thanks very much!

3. Rain. Torrential rain. There is water everywhere. I had to wrap every book in my backpack in plastic this morning. Break out the ark, Noah.

4. Class til 9 PM. A whole day spent at school. Nice.

5. Still no call back from my phone interview last week. Am I in or am I out? Put me out of my misery!!!

The only bright side to today was the emails I got from a certain mister mister who is calling me tomorrow. That’s right, just a short while after declaring how happy I am not to be dating, I’m apparently jumping right back into the dating pool. My potential date is tall, dark, has a great smile, and happens to be British (I can’t wait to hear the accent). He’s also a law student at BU. Keepin it all in the family. I’ll keep you posted. Off to bed!